Family law lawyers in Grand Rapids, Michigan, will have differing opinions on this topic. The short answer is that starting a war against your spouse is a losing strategy both in the short term and the long term of a divorce case. A divorce attorney in Grand Rapids Michigan should know that the Judges and Referees that decide these cases have very little patience for parties and attorneys who have the mistaken belief that mud-slinging is a winning strategy. The last thing these decision-makers want to see is adults acting like teenagers to disparage and defame their spouses at every turn of the case and at every hearing. The Judges who preside over cases in their respective counties are well aware of those attorneys who have a “scorched earth” approach to the practice of law. Unfortunately, many clients are led to believe that the only good attorney is a “bulldog” who is ready to fight over every issue. There is no question that every client should have strong counsel who fights for their client’s rights in a divorce case. Clients must see that their attorney is willing to fight for their causes all the way. The top divorce lawyers in Grand Rapids, Michigan, understand that their client’s rights can be protected with thorough preparation for hearings, a firm grasp of the law and the facts, and an appropriate amount of zealousness. A dog and pony show that needlessly slings mud at the other spouse is rarely, if ever successful, and does not create any level of credibility with the Judges, their Referees, the mediators in the case, or the Friend of the Court investigators who may be rendering an opinion on what custody and parenting time should look like. The Judges rely heavily on the opinions of the Friend of the Court investigator and there is no easier way to turn off a F.O.C. investigator by providing them with a binder full of documents trying to demonstrate what a horrible person the other spouse is. To make matters worse, if you spend the entire investigation interview process on a smear campaign of your spouse, you have actually sabotaged your own position in a custody battle because one of the factors the investigator must determine is if a particular parent has the ability to facilitate a positive relationship between the children and the other parent.
Divorce lawyers in Grand Rapids, Michigan are well aware that they must address specific problems in a divorce case such as domestic violence, drug or alcohol abuse, serious mental health issues, and infidelity. These topics should not be ignored, however, clients must be aware that the most compelling way to present their case is to present positive attributes that the client has rather than simply trying to drag the other spouse down. There is a fine line to walk when pointing out the other spouse’s weaknesses. A classic example of this is mental illness. People don’t ask to have afflictions like depression or anxiety. As long as someone is getting the right help through counseling and possibly medication, the other side should be careful about browbeating their spouse over this issue. Judges and decision-makers are essentially turned off by a negative smear campaign perpetrated by one party or the other. People all have imperfections that need to be addressed, however, the prevailing view is that Judges want to hear about your positive attributes and what you have done as a parent, for example. This could be in the form of good attendance at parent-teacher conferences, maybe you are the soccer or baseball coach, or maybe you have been heavily involved in your child’s theatre, church, or choir group. Family law attorneys in Grand Rapids, Michigan should be counseling their client that some of the more serious issues of domestic violence, or substance abuse must be brought to the court’s attention, however, in the final analysis, it is the client’s ability to focus on their own positive attributes that will help that client gain greater footing in all aspects of divorce and custody cases.
About the author: Sean Patrick Cox has been litigating divorce and custody cases for over 26 years and is considered one of the best divorce attorneys in Grand Rapids, Michigan.
Please call the Law Offices of Sean Patrick Cox, P.L.L.C. in Grand Rapids, Michigan at 616-942-6404, to set up a free consultation.
Sean Patrick Cox is a lawyer. Sean practices in two main areas, family law, and elder law. he has represented clients in complex divorce cases since 1994.
